C.T. 04

Calin: “DOLHANNA!!” Holding the vile between my thumb and fore finger, nostrils flared, heart thundering every muscle shaking from anger, “Care to fucking explain this??? How could you fucking do this?? I thought you loved me!! YOU are my fucking everything and for you to prevent me from getting you with a babe?? WHY LHANNA, WHY????” Throwing the vile across the room, it shatters as it hits the fucking wall. Stomping around to the side of the bed where Lhanna sat up, grabbing her by the arms rougher than I intended and pulling her to her feet. Eyes burning, looking over her naked body and the marks that were left on her from the 72 hours love lovemaking we had. Giving her a small shake, “Answer me Dolhanna, WHY would you do this?? Obviously you think I’m not good enough to sire young on the King’s niece!!” Pushing her away from me, she falls back to a sitting position on the bed. Stomping to my closet, throwing open the sliders with a bang I walk in and grab a pair of leathers and forcibly stuff in one leg then the other. Grabbing a pair of combats and socks I walk back out. I can’t breathe, everything is red. I need to get the hell outta her before I do some real serious fucking damage here. Never would I hit my female, EVER. But I need to go; this is all some sick fucking joke…. Glaring at the only female I ever loved; the one who just ripped my fucking heart right out of my God damned chest, I sit in a chair yanking on the socks. “Well??” Leaning my elbows on my knees, scrubbing my face with my hand I look her waiting for an answer.

Dolhanna:

Hearing Calin yell out my name, I instantly come awake, my eyes focused on the empty bottle that had held the serum. Eyes darting to the draw and back to Calin he asks if I “care to fucking explain.” Shit. Sitting up, pulling the sheet to my chest holding it in both hands to hide the trembling, I open my mouth to answer when he starts yelling that he thought I loved him and I didn’t think he was good enough to give me babes. “Calin NO! That’s not it at all!!” He throws the vile, shattering the glass in a million pieces. I have never seen him this mad. Ever. I did this to him and he thinks I don’t love him! I should have talked to him about waiting to be pahrents. With angry strides he comes to my side of the bed and yanks me to my feet, giving me a shake demanding that I answer him. I feel the tears burning at the back of my eyes knowing I totally fucked up. He pushes me away from him and goes to his closest; he comes back out wearing his leathers, “Calin…” he slams himself down in a chair to put on the socks and boots; demanding an explanation. My heart is beating so hard I know he hears it, I feel the tears finally break free and roll down my cheeks. Looking at the anguish and hurt on his face, in his beautiful lavender eyes I try to explain. Moving to where he is on the chair, I drop to my knees to look up at him. “Mo chroí, mo shaol maité you will be the best pahpa EVER, I want to have little ones with you.” Swallowing hard at the hurt I have caused him I push on. “You have to know how much I love you, never doubt that. My life for yours.” Squeezing his thigh where my hand rests he brushes it off; it might as well been a slap to my face. “I’m just not ready for young yet, we are fighting this war and I have every intention of fighting it until we bring Zelina down. I know you will not let me fight if you think I am with babe. Calin we will have young I swear to you! You are more than worthy! I should have talked to you. I’m sorry baby, please.” Sobbing, I place both hands over my face, sitting on the floor naked, crying. Not an hour ago we were making love… I did this; by not believing that he would understand. He steps around me and goes to his dresser pulling out a t-shirt and pulls it over his head. Going back to the closet, grabbing his black leather coat he puts it on. “Calin??” His back to me, I reach up and place a hand on his shoulder. He shrugs off my touch and without turning around he says: “ I cannot believe you didn’t trust me enough with your feelings and your thoughts Dolhanna. I have to go.” He heads out of the bedroom and down the hall. Grabbing the blanket from the bed I run after him calling to him… “CALIN!! Please don’t leave!! Calin!!!” He pauses at the door, shakes his head and leaves; quietly closing the door. He might as well have slammed it for the finality of the sound. Standing there numb, disbelieving that he left me. He left…this is all my fault. Unable to stop it from happening I scream.. “Nooooooo!!!!” As I reach out toward the closed door, the room begins to spin and I drop to the floor. Sobbing uncontrollably, I lay there most of the night unable to move, unable to deal with the fact that one stupid decision cost me my mate….. Forcing myself up from the floor I drag myself back to the bedroom. Seeing the rumbled bed, the shattered glass causes my heart to constrict even tighter. Woodenly, I take one of Calin’s t-shirt’s out of the open draw. Dropping the blanket to the floor I put the shirt on. It comes to my knees; the scent of the ocean at night and that dark musk that is my male lingers on it. Padding back to the bed that smells of him and our love making I crawl back in and pull his pillow to me. My tears fall silently and steadily down my cheeks as my heart shatters into a million broken pieces.

Calin: Closing the door on Lhanna, leaving her there so vulnerable, hurting was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Hearing her scream “No” through the door destroys me even more.. I’m fucking hurting too. I feel the stinging behind my eyes. She didn’t trust me enough to come to me; to talk to me about waiting to start a family. Shaking my head, I have got to get the fuck out of here. She doesn’t trust me; my female doesn’t trust me and has no faith in me. The thought that mi amor feels she can’t come to me is a blow I can’t fucking deal with. My hands are shaking so damn bad I can’t get my cell out of my pocket. Opening and closing my hands in fists to try and stop the shaking. I finally get that shit in check I send Viho a text first; {I have to get the fuck out of here. I’m leaving you in charge. Will call later} hitting send, I pull up Rodman’s info, shooting him a text as well: {You fucking look out for Dolhanna, do NOT let anything happen to her} hitting send, I put the phone away. My anger is obvious; domestics are looking away as I pass them on my way out of the Estate. My fucking anger, hurt, betrayal or whatever the fuck you want to call it needs an outlet. Walking through the first set of doors, then the vestibule, I hit the double doors and the cool, early Spring air hits my face. Knowing exactly where I need to go, I vapor out…..